Why hold on?

It's been 3 years since I last visited Cambodia. This time I was privileged to see the work done since and its amazing how just keeping faithful to the task can do so much. This is what I told our Singapore staff.

Shammah - one of the 3 mighty men of David stood his ground on a field full of lentils and defended it. While all Israel fled, he struck the Philistines down and the Lord brought about a great victory (2 Sam 23:11-12). Are lentils worth dying for? No.

It was inheritance that Shammah guarded. He stayed when everyone fled. He fought because he was trained, he treasured his inheritance, he recognised his responsibility over it and there was no one else. Would the Lord not give victory? Not likely. The Lord was pleased with such faithfulness and devotion. It is not like Esau who despised his birthright. It is not like the prodigal son who squandered his inheritance. Shammah was His trophy of faith and faithfulness. He was the person for God to show His might, power and faithfulness.

And so it is. Even though we have no apparent fruit for showing, the fact that the work is still alive is because we have faithful Shammahs guarding and holding on to the precious plots till the sowers and planters return to till the land.

Praise God for the likes of Shammah!

Once a Cedarian, always a Cedarian!

There were only three tables filled when I arrived. I walked around to look for familiar faces. Yes this was last minute as I was supposed to be out of the country and now I take the place of someone who was ill.

I reached a table of seniors and somehow they looked like teachers. I greeted one and found out she was Mrs Veronica Poore! I remember! She looked like Mrs Poore our Discipline Mistress. She was elegant. When I told her I was Choy Wai Fann, the other teacher said "I know Choy Wai Fann." And amazingly this was Mrs Elsie Kheng ... the lady I quote all the time regarding how I have kept my size. I was dizzy. I had been thinking of Elsie as I had met her brother a few times before. Then someone else was a Domestic Science teacher and I said I know a Mrs Soh ... and she was right there two seats away. With Mrs Soh we talked about the Lake Toba trip we went on at the end of 1974... and she pointed out Mr Subramaniam sitting opposite her. And I recognised him. He looked like Mr Maniam! We talked about that memorable trip like it was yesterday.

More teachers were found ... Mrs Maggie Chan, Ms Yvonne Seah and Ms Lee my fierce Science teacher. Its funny how they began to be recognizable and then familiar within minutes. It seemed like time stood still for them as they all looked well and trim.

Its been 35 years. Wow... and the current principal reported how well the school did and I was proud. Further on the games mistress declared she was glad to see the teachers and that she was on the swim team ... My ears propped. When she mentioned Mrs Choy the teacher in charge and her captain who was me I waved for her attention. Magical. Could not believe it as I knew there was no Rina on my team. True enough she was using a different name for work and she brought our year book that featured the swimmers.

It was a great evening, very emotional for me - my first reconnect with the school. And the huge treat that the teachers were all MY teachers. They were glad for what I have been doing and I felt like their legacy.

I have always thought our school colours and uniform were unique. Whenever I see a Cedar girl I will tell her I am one too. But through the years, Cedarians have proven to be more than colours and appearances. Many have been making a difference and making significant contributions - its got to be the teachers and the sustained core values that have been upheld through the years.

Sofa so good!

Yes I gave my sofa away. My painter asked for it on behalf of his friend who had moved into a new home but had no money left for a sofa. I was glad that within hours 3 adults and 3 children came and took it. There was more space for the renewal project that was rolling out in the flat. Furniture come and go and this going was a relief.

When the changes were done I started to rearrange and put things up again. I was thinking of the sofa that I wanted. Fuss free and cool to sit on. Then I saw it. I was returning after lunch and the cleaners were moving a wooden sofa out of the elevator. "You are throwing this away?" I asked and they said "You want?" I looked under the torn fabric and said yes very quickly. I could always get these guys to move it out if I changed my mind. These workers help flat dwellers to move bulky furniture for free!

So they checked with their supervisor and had permission to move it to my unit. I cleaned it. After tearing out the torn fabric, the original cushion cover was beautiful. I took pictures and showed my friends the before and after of the sofa. It did not help that on Sunday there was a full write up about bed bugs ... how they move and survive ... and come through old furniture! I was warned that the sofa could be infested.

With heaviness of heart I treated the sofa as prescribed. So far whatever God gave me had been good stuff. They get better after I recondition them and have esteem positions in my home. Then I am also aware that the land flowing with milk and honey for the children of Israel had enemies that must be wiped out before they live in it. So I proceeded. I dripped the lethal formula through the joints and fabric of the entire piece and waited.

No bugs. Beyond that, the dried glue that held the previous fabric was falling off! So while trying to remove the bugs that thankfully were not there, the dried glue was also removed!

This is more than my dream chair. It is an exotic piece. I saw the beauty under the torn fabric and it now sits in regal stature, with a story that will be told again and again, how it came to us.

Surprise!

"What's good at Upper Serangoon Shopping Centre? Fish head curry, and lots of cooked dishes!" So I was told as we walked for lunch. I was skeptical as I felt the best was Johnny's. Jia Yi is an insignificant shop at a shopping complex, but the air-conditioning made it welcoming.

I tried the Fried Kway Teow and was floored. The cockles were fresh and succulent and to top it off I had my lunchmate's share of cockles as well. When we left I decided to try the fish head curry for dinner.

K ma had no dinner plans nor appetite until I told her what I was bringing. I was 15 mins early at Jia Yi's and the chef reminded me that I was supposed to be there later. But I caught him cooking and the aroma was amazing. I told him K ma was excited about dinner and so was I.

When the fish was served, she was thrilled and could not contain herself. Her appetite was quickly restored as the curry was really good. There were many phone calls while we ate. Four were from her grandchildren and children who were concerned as she had been sad the past few days. She had just lost a close friend. She would ask them to guess who was with her at dinner and then tell them I was there. Then to guess what I brought for dinner and tell that I brought the fish curry and that she would save some for them.

I was very happy. Just realising how her sad few days had just been halted by a simple shared dinner made me smile for many days after.

Surprise! Just being open to a possible tastier way of cooking Fish head curry led to a new chef and the need to share it with someone was so richly rewarded. Both of us praised God for His love for us - we thanked Him for appetite, for friends to share with and family that care that we might be eating alone.

Why celebrate?

There are some dates I remember. These are the birthdates of my siblings and their children. Tomorrow is my nephew's birthday and he actually gets a holiday from school. Well he is in Primary 5 and not involved in the Primary 6 islandwide oral examination! Good for him and for me, I get to have his company for 2-3 hours.

This guy is precious. He arrived after mum fought and had her cancer in remission. She was very disappointed when a new primary set in as she wanted very much to be the care giver. And she fought really hard but the enemy was relentless. There were a few days that I had to baby sit birthday boy who was then just about 2. I had photos of those days and they are special - mum's time with him and my attempts to amuse him on the record!

Alas when she was near the end, she described each of her grandchildren with deep insight. She thought birthday boy was intelligent and possibly be up to mischief if unguided. When we finally walked the last journey behind the hearse, I was carrying this little guy and he was a great consolation.

And so I treasure this gift of life as God slowly and painfully took away mum's. I celebrate his life and want him to know how grandma fought to live because he was so precious and so desired. What a happy birthday it will be to know you are loved and you are a delight to have and a strong motivation for living!

I see you!

After a trip to the west, I usually wake up in the early hours of dawn because of jet-lag. I decided during my last trip that I will walk to work instead of a 15 minute drive. This happens till I get adjusted.

I did it again today not because of jet lag but I just wanted to enjoy the 60 minute workout. The journey requires the crossing of many major road junctions and today I enjoyed road users who were aware of pedestrians like me. It felt really good when this driver anticipated my crossing before I reached the crossing point - basically he waited when he "rightly" need not. I smiled and waved a 'thank you' for his thoughtfulness. These gestures of acknowledging the presence and need of another person and the return of appreciation make a great start for a regular day. I like today!

Why TOC?

I realised I was a convert today!

Funny that's how I discovered I was a Calvinist too, by saying what I said and I get pigeonholed.

Someone in the audience asked if there were social work professionals who could feedback as to what they think of TOC tools for them or their clients. The point made was that most professionals in the helping services were armed with tonnes of skills and each has his/her own expertise in solving problems. We should first understand how they work and see how TOC could be used in their fields.

I said we were not here to hard sell the tools but if the professionals want to try something new, they could check this out. I identified myself as a socialwork professional and school counsellor for a long time. and how I found the three tools useful and that a friend who recently completed her post graduate studies in Counselling also asked for the tools. This man said "But you are a convert!"

I was pleased and wanted to ask him why he thought I would use the tools especially if I am a qualified social work professional and practicing counsellor ... what do you think?

Doron's donkey story

I met Doron at breakfast and told him I've had an awakening kind of experience and here's his story. The best is to hear the story teller himself, but hey the next best is this!

There was a farmer and his wife who bought a donkey to help them on the farm. They loved Donney, fed it, cleaned it and did all that good masters do. Donney was happy and perfect in all ways except work. They just could not get him to work!

After all the failed attempts they came to the town's Donkey Expert. He agreed to help on the condition that the couple would not get involved at all and remain quiet and at a distance at all times. This was very hard for the couple but they relented as they were at wits end.

DE took up a stone, aimed at Donney and threw it at him. No sweat, Donney was cool and remained non-chalant. DE carried a larger stone - the size of Donney's nose and aimed again. The farmer and his wife were shocked. How could DE do such a thing? But they agreed not to interfere so they held their breath and each other. DE was right on target but hey, Donney was fine ... he was a strong animal.

For a while the couple wondered where DE went. Then to their horror, they saw him up a cliff and was pushing a huge, gigantic rock over where Donney was. This would be the death of their darling Donney and they were in tears. Yes the rock came down and down went Donney.

It took three days for Donney to get on his feet and when he did, he was not recognizable! He went straight to work and was able to accomplish the tasks of 3 donkeys!

"Why DE? What is your secret?" the farmers asked.
"Well ... before you tell him anything, you just need to get his attention."

Why Odyssey?

It is a time where I can be totally selfish ... just think of myself, my gifts, my purpose (why am I here) and my goal (where I want to be at) in life ... and make a plan to reach it. Can't say I was not clear before, but it is important, in view of the shortness of time and the uncertainties of life to make sure ... try some other way to check and discover friends along the journey.

First instalment of reward:
Actionable step: Find checkers to help me be a scientist in my approach to life, people who will challenge me, question me, prove me wrong ... and its OK cos a scientist will be surprised if his first prototype is a success! These are people who love me and care about my half baked ideas and see to it that I have covered all negative outcomes that I did not think about. I have four of them now. I call them flies over my head, so I have F1-F4 :)

Second instalment of reward:
Odyssey Part II: Could not complete the process in 5 days and have F1 to continue the process here! It is such a privilege to have sustained and keen follow-up.

And the journey goes on.